The Skill Of Self-Confidence

Melisa-prowriter
5 min readDec 22, 2022

Self-confidence is the feeling of faith and trust in your own abilities, skills, experience, and judgment. It’s the belief that you’re good enough to accomplish the task before you. It’s believing in yourself. People can have different levels of self-confidence in different areas of their life. You may have complete self-confidence at work but have no self-confidence in your ability to fix your own car or do home improvement projects yourself. Self-confidence comes from knowing you are competent in some area of your life.

What are the skills of self-confidence?

Not accepting failure.

People with self-confidence don’t see failures as final, they see them as lessons and short-term setbacks. When you believe in yourself you will try to accomplish something over and over again until you do. Self-confident people are already a success in their mind and they make circumstances match what their internal state of mind already believes.

Self-Confidence: Believe In Yourself

Not believing obstacles are permanent.

Confident people are not mentally or emotionally crushed by not winning on their first try, they have the grit to try again and again as they are just looking for the way around a current obstacle. They have the will to move obstacles out of their way on the path to where they are going.

Aggressive goal setting.

People that are self-confident tend to set higher goals for their self than people with insecurities. Many times goals are a reflection of what someone thinks are the peak of their abilities. You will only attempt to accomplish what you believe is possible for you. Your self-confidence is like a dial that sets the levels for your dreams. The more you believe in yourself the bigger your goals will tend to be.

Growth mindset.

Self-confidence can give people a growth mindset where they believe where they are now in life is not where they must stay. Confidence in yourself can allow you to see how you can change your life to get from where you are now to where you want to be. Self-confidence can create an inner compass that makes you take the actions to become what you believe you should be. When your beliefs about yourself don’t match your current situation then it creates cognitive dissonance and you will both consciously and unconsciously do what it takes to have your external life match your beliefs.

Why is self-confidence an important skill?

Self-confidence is an important skill because it makes you secure in your own skin and comfortable with who you are.

Self-confidence helps with stress management because if you have faith in yourself you worry less as you believe in your own abilities to get things done. Self-confidence can lower cortisol levels as you are more assertive, confident, and relaxed and not triggering your fight or flight response. People that are operating in their circle of confidence will experience less stress than people doing things where they have no confidence in their abilities.

High self-confidence can give people the energy to get things done and accomplish tasks. If people believe that they will be successful they tend to be more enthusiastic and energized in their work as they know the eventual outcome.

Self-confidence gives people the desire to try to accomplish more. When your faith is in yourself and you’re not relying on your circumstances then you can confidently attempt to expand your circle of competence and pursue success in other areas of your career, business, and life.

How Do You Develop Self-Confidence Skills?

Positive self-talk

You can be your own best friend or your own worst enemy. Very few people are aware of how their own inner narrative affects their thoughts, behaviors, and beliefs about their self. People with self-confidence have more positive self-talk tendencies and tend to interpret events in a much different way than people with low self-esteem do.

If you have self-confidence you will act more like your own self-help coach by what you say to yourself. People with self-confidence build their self up. People with low self-confidence tend to translate everything as their own fault and proof of their negative belief system. If you want to develop your own self-confidence you must start with guarding your own thoughts and inner narrative. Self-confidence starts with a belief in yourself as a person with their own strengths and life skills.

Endless practice

If you want to develop self-confidence in any area of life then having skills helps with that. If you want to have skills then you must practice doing something a lot until you get really good at it or even master it. Competence must come before confidence and practice comes before competence. Practice must do done in a way that improves your skills through the proper process along with a feedback loop that helps you improve your results. If you want deep valid self-confidence in some area then master it.

Not allowing losers in your life.

People with low self-esteem can have the weakness of allowing toxic negative people in their life and then letting them stay. If you have high self-confidence you will not allow people to treat you badly because you value yourself more than that. Confident people tend to have people like their self in their life, people that are positive and build them up.

Experience

Nothing builds self-confidence faster than the experience of success. People with high self-confidence tend to have a lot of success because they try things most people would never attempt. Their outsized attempts lead to more successes than most other people have. These successes increase self-confidence in a positive feedback loop that enables them to try things at higher levels for a chance for even bigger wins.

Self-confidence starts with a belief in yourself in some area of life. You can start there and build on that thing. Go for small wins early and keep rising your level of attempts. Your self confidence will grow as you prove to yourself what you can do. If other people can accomplish something you can learn from them and do the same thing once you know it’s possible.

The primary thing that holds people back is their own belief system about their self. Once you get your psychology right all you need is a system for success!

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Melisa-prowriter
Melisa-prowriter

Written by Melisa-prowriter

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